Tag Archives: writer

Help Me Create My Next Bedtime Story Episode on YouTube

We all know I’ve been having a hard time getting to my writing.

Whether its depression, anxiety, sleep deprivation causing hallucinations, or inability to justify to myself working on writing stories when I have no money due to being unemployed once again… It’s been an uphill battle to get to a point where I am writing more than a few days out of the month.

So I’ve begun creating a whispered bedtime story on my YouTube channel, in hopes of keeping my creativity fed and breeding.

The first installment was pretty good for coming up with a story on the spot and then immediately posting it for the world to see. Or, hear, rather.

But life kicked me where it really hurt and the second part of the story suffered from exhaustion.

 

What I’d LOVE to have happen is for you to become my patron and spitball ideas with me on how to proceed with part 3 of the story. You throw me ideas and we’ll pick them apart together and you just might spark my exhaustion into early retirement.

Let me know what you think should happen next, what creatures you’d enjoy joining the cast, and what you’d like Loska to do about her craving for a certain prize the djinn require from her.

Become my patron and let me know. 😍 I’m excited to see what we can create together!

Click the following link to join me.

https://www.patreon.com/posts/help-me-create-24869136

 

Don’t worry, becoming my patron doesn’t cost an arm, leg, or your unborn first child. 😀

Becoming my patron means you’ll be helping me keep creating in a world that doesn’t think creative types should be paid for their contributions to planet earth. It literally can be as little as $3 a month. Literally.

There are 4 different ways to become my patron. Become my Cohort in Crazy, my Messy Mystery Mate, Beta Buddy, or Pal Beyond the Pale. For more info on each option of becoming my patron – and all the perks that come with it – click the following link.

 

And if this isn’t your thing, no worries. Stay tuned for the next episode of my bedtime story. (And if that’s not your thing, then don’t worry about any of this. 😊 Continue on being awesome.)

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I Know Better

And yes, I remember you.

Slinking through the corridors at night while no one was watching.

I saw you.

I knew you.

 

I remember the air in your veins breathing past my lips.

Filling every heartbeat until my teeth burned.

They didn’t know you had a secret.

Or where you went.

I knew you.

 

They say you don’t exist.

 

By Daphne Shadows

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Empty Tongues

Hushed footsteps
Is there such a thing?
The carpet could be screaming for all we know.
Our socks could be praying for mercy.

We act like everything is trying to silence us
We blame doors, padding, muzzles
Why bother?

It’s not like many are trying to speak up
Any longer
We have families, you see
People to hurt
Dreams to set ablaze

They have us quite choked on fear
Our volume turned to mute
Our choices turned to disregard
Don’t they?

They’ve taken our vocal cords
Buried them in the cellar
While they feast on Just Corpses

No one behind the curtain
No one soundproofing our eyes

But I bet that’s the carpet’s fault
Hushing our footsteps.

 

By Daphne Shadows

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Writer Nerves

I have them.

Right now.

As we speak (or, you know, as I write this), I am uploading a video onto YouTube.

This video has me nervous. Unsure. Kinda wishing I would accidentally delete it.

 

What is it?

Why, thank you for asking, super-secret blogosphere stalker.

It is the first video in a new series of bedtime stories.

I’m doing this thing called ASMR. (I’ll talk more about that at a future date.)

For now, all you need to know is I’ve created a playlist called “ASMR Whispering Originals”. 

It’s something I have never done before.

I am used to writing stories, editing and re-writing them eight thousand times before ANYONE SEES THEM, EVER.

 

I am kinda FREAKING OUT!

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The bedtime story?

I didn’t write it.

I didn’t edit it.

I didn’t even come up with a plot line.

 

I jotted down a few ideas –

“once upon a time”

“magic in the world”

“all magic taken away by dragons to keep humans safe”

“magic put into 3 strongest creatures: one young woman, one mother, one old man”

“go to djinn”

“break rules”

“knock on doors for dragon egg”

“ask the dead”

 

That’s it.

I made everything up as I went.

And I’ve not edited it. Nor have I ever told a story out loud. I’m not sure I’m good at it. I’m not even certain I like it. And I swallow really loudly once during the video.

*eye twitch*

Did I mention I’m whispering the whole time? (It’s an ASMR thing.)

 

Anywho. I have that writely clenching before exposing a story to another human being. Only this time it’s very, very different and probably has more adverbs than you can shake a stick at.

I think if I can get over the writer uncertainty (and shut my inner critic in the basement), that it would be fun.

It was a little fun, actually, to come up with stuff and whisper as I went. Now all I need to do is get over the fear and focus on having fun.

Besides, it’s a bedtime story. It’s supposed to be flowery and weird and not precise or make entirely perfect sense.

 

Any writers here ever make something up on the spot and show it to your audience immediately? It’s terrifying. How’d you deal with it? Did you have fun?

I swear I should make a new 30-day fear challenge. This is totally terrifying.

Afraid of it?

Doing it.

 

Oh, and it isn’t the entire story.

What do you think?

To be continued…

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Writerly Snapshots

I am so excited to announce that I am officially getting back into writing.

It has been much too long.

I am a storyteller and not writing has been quite painful.

The only thing that has kept me from imploding was writing this blog and poetry.

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When you know what your calling in life is – do it.

What is your calling?

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I Dreamt I was Loki

It’s true.

I had a dream I was Tom Hiddleston as Loki.

Don’t worry, it’s not the first time that I’ve dreamt I was a dude. The first time that happened, I was Will Smith.

Which is weird, considering I like being a chick.

*shrug*

Perhaps it’s a writerly thing.

 

Anywho… back to me being Loki.

*wiggles eyebrows*

 

 

The entire human species was on a living ship in the depths of the ocean. I say ship and not submarine because somehow it was a bloody ship and we weren’t covered in water even though we were submerged in it.

It’s a dream. Run with me here.

Something was causing a huge hole in the bottom of the ship, which was allowing water to actually get into it. Or onto it. Whatever. Hole in the bottom – death by drowning looming on the human race.

Loki (me) was trying to help Captain America and Thor fix the issue. In the beginning of the dream Loki was a bad guy but by this point he (me) is an anti-hero. So, a good guy. Trying to save all the people.

Glad you’re all caught up. Moving on.

Then my grandma is in the dream, and she’s in one of the bottom levels of the ship (it has loads of levels, because you know, entire population of world stuffed in there) and her dog (she doesn’t have one in real life) is dying. She was above her sleeping area in another level at the time of the hole being created and escaped with a lot of others.

She called me (Loki) to save her dying dog. (I think he was dying of old age.)

Loki gets to the dog but then my grandma, still on the phone (because apparently cell reception in the middle of the ocean in a ship that doesn’t let in water while being fully submerged, is great!) decides she doesn’t want me to risk my life by trying to get her dog, since her dog is dying soon anyway. I, Loki, was like, just because your sweet little fluff-ball of a dog is going to die, doesn’t mean his remaining life doesn’t matter. And he shouldn’t die alone. So Loki saves the dog.

Then the dream does dream like stuff and skips ahead. I’m still Loki but now we know that the hole in the huge ship was caused by The Villain of this dream – and now we know who that is.

Captain America and Thor try to fight off the Villain in an end-of-the-movie-like-showdown.

Human lives hanging in the balance. *drama*

 

 

Captain America and Thor are fighting against the Villain and they get thrown to the ground in dramatic movie fashion after hitting each other really hard.

*rolls eyes* This is in my subconscious, don’t forget.

Then the Villain isn’t the Villain anymore.

The Villain is Loki, lying there all beat up and disillusioned.

It becomes apparent to me (in the way dreams just let you “suddenly know” things because it’s in your own bloody head) that Loki and the Villain share the same body. Two different beings, one body. And Loki didn’t know this until just now. Neither did anyone else.

Captain America looks at Thor. “Two beings in one body. That’s a problem.”

Or something like that. It sounded cooler in my dream.

They both look at Loki, who says, “You know the only way to kill him is to kill me.”

And you know what the sad thing is?

Captain America and Thor don’t even try to figure something out. They just nod at one another, then Loki, and walk forward with the intent to kill him. And Loki just sits there.

Then I woke up.

 

You know what the actual sad part of this is?

I realized I’m not just Loki in this dream. I’m Captain America and Thor too.

Because I am always the one to give up on me. I never stand up for myself or my dreams. I never say, “wait, we can figure this out so I can live too”. I never try to be my own friend or protector. Never try to understand or help out or wait for.

I am always trying to pretend it is outside forces that keep me from writing or exercising or making the changes I want to make and becoming the person I dream of being.

But it’s not.

It’s me.

I’m pointing at Captain America and Thor – but it’s me, Loki.

Just sitting there. Knowing I will give up on myself and just waiting to die some more inside.

 

My being Loki was interesting to me.

Loki and the Villain in one body. That’s a whole can of worms for me. Yes, I’m my own worst enemy, but it goes further than that for me. Yes, I am bipolar and at odds with myself, and moody, but still. More to it.

But you’d have to understand my relationship with the character Loki before knowing all the meaning the dream holds for me.

I’ve liked Loki the Trickster long before the Marvel movies. I love mythology and tricksters just kinda do it for me. Plus Loki in the recent movies was unloved and treated poorly, then became evil and terrible as a coping mechanism. There’s a whole list of reasons Loki is relatable to me. (Not that I plan on becoming arrogant and murderous.)

I also particularly like Captain America because he always does the right thing, whether that means standing alone or not. No clue why Thor was in there. Not that I don’t like him. There are loads of heroes and versions and mythologies and let’s not get into that because it would be never ending. I just love superheroes and mythology.

 

 

I’m certain there are tons of interpretations behind this dream.

I figured if I wrote it out for all to see, I’d think about it more, instead of ignore it. Because ignoring myself is something I do FABULOUSLY.

But I’m hearing from many sources – including psychology sources – that dreams are a lot more our brain and a lot less wishy washy things to be ignored. So if my subconscious is trying to tell me something, I’m trying to listen. This week anyway.

 

Just so you know – I don’t think it comes across in this post – I actually really enjoyed the dream. And I woke up in a good mood. Its like a symbolic, mythological, superhero, metaphorical map of my subconscious.

 

What do you guys think my dream means?

Had any interesting dreams lately?

Obsessed with mythology?

 

(As for my grandma appearing in my dream, that’s personal.)

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Egyptian Ankh Symbolism

The ankh is a hieroglyph (representation of a concept) for “life”. It symbolizes eternal life, to be specific.

Egyptologists, archaeologists, religionists, historians, random people – no one can decide on where the ankh came from. Where the idea spawned from. Why some random ancient Egyptian dude or dudette made a teardrop/cross shaped thingy and wore it as a necklace.

No clue.

Like most symbolism, mythology, and archaeology, we have no freaking idea. We’re just guessing from what we have when it comes to things like Celtic symbolism, runes, and ancient Egyptian symbolism. If something isn’t literally written out, we don’t know anything for certain.

And I am in no way an Egyptologist, so I have no clue either. But I love symbolism and I’ve always been fascinated by the Ancient Egyptians. So this is what I’ve found and what I like.

I am, after all, a writer. I like poking at things, collecting stories. Possibilities.

 

 

One theory is that the ankh is a combination of female and male. Some believe it was first used as a belt buckle for the goddess Isis.

“The theory of Egyptologist E.A. Wallis Budge (1857-1934 CE), who claims it originated from the belt buckle of the goddess Isis, is considered more probable but still not universally accepted. Wallis Budge equated the ankh with the tjet, the “knot of Isis”, a ceremonial girdle thought to represent female genitalia and symbolizing fertility. This theory, of the ankh’s origin stemming from a fertility symbol, is in keeping with its meaning throughout ancient Egyptian history and beyond to the present day. Egyptologist Wolfhart Westendorf (b. 1924 CE) supports Wallis Budge’s claim”

Combined with other amulets the ankh could bring the wearer greater health. It was also known as a powerful magical talisman, some believe. There’s a huge dispute on that one. Careful who you say that too. You might get your head bit off.

Here’s an interesting tidbit…

“Archeologists have discovered pictures in ancient Egypt that show the gods pouring water on the pharaoh’s head as part of a cleansing or ritual for purification. The water is shown as chains of ankhs”

According to Scholar Adele Nozedar:

“The ankh represents the male and female genitalia, the sun coming over the horizon, and the union of heaven and earth… Its resemblance to a key gives a clue to another meaning of this magical symbol. The Egyptians believed that the afterlife was as meaningful as the present one and the ankh provided the key to the gates of death and what lay beyond”

 

The ankh is often depicted on the Egyptian god’s and goddesses’ fingertips. For example, Isis, who was connected to rites of the dead and known as a magical healer. Or Anubis, the jackal god associated with mummification and the afterlife. Let’s try Ma’at. The goddess of truth, harmony, balance, and justice. And don’t forget Osiris, the god of the underworld and judge of the dead. And to wrap things up, the sun god Ra.

The ankh eventually became a symbol of the planet Venus, and then the goddess Venus (or Aphrodite).

Apparently every divine being had an ankh. Or were throwing ankhs at their subjects’ heads.

Christians, as usual, adopted the symbol in their quest to take over the world. As opposed to demonizing it. (No offense to Christians, I’m a Christian. Every religion and pretty much every country tried taking over the world at some point. *rolls eyes*)

“Its shape has been variously understood as the rising sun on the horizon, as the union of male and female, or other opposites, and also as a key to esoteric knowledge and to the afterworld of the spirit. The Coptic church of Egypt inherited the ankh as a form of the Christian cross, symbolizing eternal life through Christ (35).”

 

The ankh is also known as a good luck charm. Probably because every Egyptian god and goddess was sporting it from their nose hairs and every Ancient Egyptian had about twenty of them just lying around or adorning their clothes, face, furniture, and probably their cats.

 

 

One thing that is known for certain, is that the Ancient Egyptians favored the symbol. It shows up all over in burial tombs, sculptures, paintings, and was carried as an amulet.

Curiously, mirrors were often found in the shape of an ankh. One theory is that the mirror could then let the owner look into another world.

“The Egyptians believed that the afterlife was a mirror image of life on earth and mirrors were thought to contain magical properties.”

 

Speaking literally, some people think the ankh is the depiction of a sandal strap. Others think it’s a flower. Yet another theory is that it’s a human raising their hands. As stated above, some think it is genitalia.

 

So basically, the ankh was the post-it note for the Ancient Egyptians. Thing was everywhere!

I absolutely love it. 🙂

I always hear of it being used as a luck charm. I’d never looked into it further so I didn’t know about all of this awesomeness. There are just so many stories and possibilities. It’s drool worthy.

As a genre fiction writer there are just so many ideas rolling around in my head.

Ankh mirrors that might peer into another realm! Eternal life! Ma’at, Ra, and Venus!

*swoon*

 

 


Sources

http://www.historyforkids.net/egyptian-ankh.html

https://www.ancient.eu/Ankh/

https://www.britannica.com/topic/Isis-Egyptian-goddess

https://www.ancient.eu/Anubis/

https://www.ancient.eu/Ma’at/

https://www.ancient.eu/osiris/

http://www.touregypt.net/featurestories/ankh.htm

http://www.touregypt.net/featurestories/re.htm

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