Day 1: Fear – Looking My Worst On Camera

For the next 30 days, I am going to record myself telling you something I’m afraid of, something I’m afraid for people to know, or tell you about something that I did that I was afraid to do that day.

I challenge you to do the same.

It’s freeing. To take what you’re afraid of and do it. To expose it. To expose all of who you are (not telling you to flash your neighbors) for people to see.

I feel we live in a world where people are trying to pretend to be someone they’re not on Facebook and Instagram and Twitter and on and on. We put up this fake self so that people think we’re only this small portion of who we really are. So here is all of me.

 

 

DAY ONE

Let’s rip this bandage off fast…

I was jogging and realized UGH people can kinda see me on the side of the road. I’m all sweaty and gross and my hair is a mess and my dark circles under my eyes look exaggerated because of how sweaty I am. And did I mention I look like I’m dying? I’M JOGGING! I probably look ready to go into cardiac arrest.

SO here I am, all sweaty, with horrible lighting with a camera bought over ten years ago, no clue how to hold a camera to make myself look good (I even had to ask my sister to help me take selfies because I didn’t know how to get the angle so I didn’t look like a conehead) and terrible lighting.

In a world where looking perfect and plastic and having perfect hair and makeup is MUY IMPORTANTE …. here is me, looking my worst.

 

 

….. I am STILL ALIVE! *passes out*

 

 

I am waiting for that feeling to hit. You know the one where you get in bed at night and your brain *dings* on what you did that day that you want to take back – you know, when you’re comfortable, ready for sleep, then your brain sits up and says WHAT ARE YOU DOING??????? GO DELETE THAT RIGHT NOW, I DON’T CARE IF YOU WAKE UP YOUR ENTIRE FAMILY, I DON’T CARE IF YOU WAKE THE NEIGHBORS, GO TAKE THAT DOWN RIGHT NOW YOU PSYCHO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!….. Yeah, that voice. I’m waiting for that one.

 

 

JUST SO YOU KNOW there was zero preparation for this. I came in from a jog and grabbed my dinky camera before I could talk myself out of it. I didn’t even check to see if I was holding the camera well enough to capture my face. I mean, part of me was like, oh well, if not, hey! That’s actually better!! Then they won’t see me, mwahahahahahaha! But yeah, crap, I did alright on that one. I didn’t plan what I was going to say or even know what I would sound like. And jeeze, if being in front of a camera isn’t scary!

 

 

What are you afraid of doing today?

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5 Comments

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5 responses to “Day 1: Fear – Looking My Worst On Camera

  1. Pingback: 30 Day Fear Challenge Updates | DaphneShadows

  2. Ruby

    Personally, I happen to think people look their best when they are not trying to look their best. No make-up, sweaty, & bags under the eyes is not ugly. I think it’s more beautiful then trying to be beautiful.

    When my husband & I first got together I was afraid of him seeing me first thing in the morning with no make up & messy hair. He said that’s when I look the most beautiful! I learned that he was seeing my inner beauty so it didn’t matter how I looked.

    Being real is more beautiful than being fake!

    Good job Daphne! I never died by walking through my fears!

    So what am I afraid of today? Of losing the people I love. In the physical sense, through death. Of missing them so much that my heart hurts.

  3. I love it! “After I did the things people make fun of I felt less afraid.” Yup!! They make fun of those things because THEY are afraid of those things. So you were way ahead of the game before you even started this challenge.

    And I love this challenge. I may join you! Go, Daphne!

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