If I Had a Title

I don’t remember where it came from or how I got on the subject but I was wondering what my title would be if I had a title. You know, like a noble person. Or a serial killer. And then I was like, um, I already have multiple. Duh. See here.


When I was younger: Paper Shredder

Oh yeah. I shredded paper for the sheer love of it. That and I had some anger issues (because I totally don’t now *rolls eyes*). I shredded paper that didn’t even need shredding. I know, wasteful, but it was better than shredding a human body. With my teeth. Just saying.

Oh, oh – and just two days ago I shredded a stack of WIP papers because I don’t have a paper shredder. Besides, they can put paper shredder papers back together if they’re dedicated enough. When you shred it by hand randomly? Harder to put back together. Not that anyone would want to put mine back together, but….


The shredding of the paper. It is fun. (this is Lucky by the way)

The shredding of the paper. It is fun. (this is Lucky by the way)


Great Food Person

I am the Great Food Person. I feed the mallows, the mum and the Lucky. Fear me. I will poison your food. Kidding! I have to eat it too…


OCD Daph and Germaphobe Daph

Heh. Yeah. OCD – I don’t actually have it. But I do like for everything to be neat, nice and precise. Where it should be. No excuses. If you had the energy and time to move it, you have the energy and time to move it back. Not that my OCD has imprinted on anyone else, but…*glare* Germaphobe – I drive my family crazy with this one, but I refuse to eat off of or drink out of food/drinks that anyone else has.


Fuzz Picker Upper

Lucky loves taking the stuffing out of stuffed animals and spreading it all throughout the house. That explains that. Following him around the living room and hallway picking up fuzz as I go.

I remember when he was a puppy-puppy, the ears off his blue elephant stuffed animal mysteriously disappeared. Come five am he drags me outside and starts puking up huge chunks of something. I’m freaking out thinking he’s vomiting up insides and then I pick through his puke (dog owner, this happens) and what do I find? Two plushy ears. Yeah. We watch him closely with his ginormous caterpillar stuffed animal now.



This is a larger elephant. He didn’t try eating it’s ears. Thank heaven.



To be quite boring with that title. Yep. Writer. I guess I could get more inventive with that. Psycho Writer. Choco-Writer. Zombie-Psycho-Choco-Writer.

I dunno.


I f I was Native American, it’d be:

….Actually I am Native American, so let me rewrite that. If I had a Native title, it would be…


Non-Affected by Adorable Faces

True story. Puppy dog eyes don’t work on me. Not from the puppy dog or the mallows. Yes, you are adorable of all adorableness, but no, you may not use the duct tape on the neighbor.


Walks into Walls

Sad but true. Being a zombie can be dangerous. Especially for walls.

Ha – and my last name is DeWall. Get it? Okay… moving on.


Walls. I walk into these.

Walls. I walk into these.


Trips over Dog

Self explanatory. And I hate it when I do that! I feel so bad. Even though I just broke my face, elbows, knees and back, I’m just hoping he doesn’t hate my guts.


Wisher of Doings

Okay, this one is bad. There are so many things I wish I could do, could start, could be. But I just keep on wishing.


Talks in Sleep

Yep. A lot.


Laughs in Sleep

Amazing feat. Especially since I don’t wake up.


Sings in Sleep

Yes – I really do this! Apparently (since it’s not like I can hear myself when I’m unconscious) I sing in my sleep. And it doesn’t wake me up. Strangest thing ever!


Hater of the Talking on the Phone

Also self-explanatory. I will text and not be annoyed. Talking on the phone? I loathe it. You better have a good, amazing reason for calling me. Or I might stab you. Through the phone. Because that is the level of my grrrr.


This + Me Talking =

This + Me Talking =





Pterodactyl Swing

When in my freshman year of high school, I attempted a golf team residency (STOP LAUGHING!), I had a problem with my swing. When I hadn’t practiced for a while, we’d laugh and say it looked like a drunk pterodactyl who was trying to swing a golf club. Yeah.


Oh, oh, and also – not a title, but I told someone I’d explain this – when I was golfing once, I’d had a horrible run and was on the last hole. Close to the green, there was a group of geese, carrying on and making noise. I hit the ball – best hit of the entire day – and hit a goose in the head. It’s wings flailed like some comic book strip character and it got up and warbled away eventually. It was totally fine but the whole scene was hilarious. It was probably one of those things that you had to be there for it to be funny, but yeah.

I’ve also been attacked by a bumblebee on the green and no one saw. Even though there were three people and a teacher standing there with me. I was running around and trying to get it away from my face, yelling and they missed the whole thing. Brain damage anyone? They were three feet from me!

So dear golfing people, I’m not big on golfing.


Pterodactyl right here.

Pterodactyl right here.


Anywho – there are so many titles I could come up with, but that would take forever. Although I’m sure that as soon as I publish this post I will think of like five titles that would fit me way better.

What would your title be if you had one? Or do you already have one (many)?

Why is your title what it is?

(wow that grammar right there made my eyes bleed)

1 Comment

Filed under Personal

To My Followers -

So, there are a few things you guys and gals should be aware of and I just realized there’s no way for you to know unless I tell you. Unless you’re psychic. In which case – GET AWAY FROM ME!


ONE – I suck at responding quickly to comments on my posts.

You guys take the time to comment and it takes me anywhere from one day to two weeks to respond. NOT COOL.

And what’s worse – you have no idea that I’ve read and loved your comment. Because I do. I read the comments but I don’t respond right then. Normally because I’ve just written a post, searched for the right pictures and posted it. And have now moved onto the next thing I need to get done.

But I HAVE read your comments and you should know I am VERY appreciative. And I’ll try to respond sooner. Just know that I will eventually respond.

Does this annoy you?



I’m listening! You just don’t know I’m there…..


TWO – I’ve had people comment that they’d like to hear more about me on my blog. My response is normally, “don’t I already talk too much about myself?”

So what would you guys like to know? Not making any promises, but what on earth would you want to know about me?


THREE – I’ve had quite a few requests on what to post as well, and I love it. I know there is a standing request for me to do a post on the messed up ideals surrounding the pentagram – but I only remember this every time someone comments on my triquetra post.

Soooo… I wrote a sticky note finally. The other requests I’ve received lately I’ve researched and posted within the same month, so I didn’t forget.

And it got me thinking, are there others out there who want me to post on something specific? Anything that interests you that I joked about doing a post on but you really would want info or more blabbering on about? Or something that has to do with something I’ve posted and you’d like a more in depth focus on that?

Again – no promises, if I’m not interested, it ain’t happening. But I won’t be mean. Promise. ;)


This fruit is in the shape of a pentagram - don't eat it! You might get possessed.  O.o Pentagram hysteria. Annoying.

This fruit is in the shape of a pentagram – don’t eat it! You might get possessed.
O.o Pentagram hysteria. Annoying.


FOUR – I am no longer using wordpress to save drafts of posts. Instead, I’m going to keep them written up in a word document and just copy and paste into wordpress when I want to publish a post. Because like any other form of technology and all its variables, it tends to malfunction now and again. Twice now I have clicked ‘trash’ only to click in later and realize that the post I just deleted was posted! The first time it happened I figured it was my bad and I was remembering wrong. The second time, not so much. I remember deleting it.

Like the post entitled, “Do Your Writerly Things and Inspirations Reflect You”. Yeah. That had TONS of pictures in it which were there simply to remind me what I was talking about. It was half a post idea with notes. Not a post to be published. And even though I deleted it off my blog when I realized it had posted, there are tons of people who still got it in their emails and read it.

Grrrr. So, no more saving here. I will be using word to save. So, I must apologize for the appearing and then disappearing posts over the past couple of months. I think it may have actually happened more than twice. But I still love wordpress. Technology isn’t foolproof.



My delete button wasn’t working.


FIVE – When I do a “part one” and don’t post on the “part two”. Sometimes it takes me forever to write the second part. Sometimes I have things I want to post more. Sometimes I get bored with the part two idea and don’t have the gusto to write it up.

Be patient. Normally, if I’m no longer going to write it up, I’ll let you know.

Bloggers – do you do this?


SIX – I stopped doing a specific series of posts. I started doing them about a year ago. Does anyone know what I’m talking about, and do you want me to keep going?


SEVEN – Thanks, by the way, for following along with my random blog.


Leave a comment

Filed under Personal

How Do You Read Books? And Where is Dr. Seuss?

People do practically everything differently. Except things like eating on a daily basis and sleeping… yeah, that’s kind of needed/required regardless of personal opinion.

But for things like taste in food, how hard your mattress is or how you read a book – there are variables. Sooooo, I bring to your attention the question of the day. Here, on this blog anyway.

How do you read a book?


Do you bend/crease the binding of your book?

When I read a book, it ends up looking like an accordion. I’ve found that this annoys some people. But honestly I don’t know how they read the freaking book without creasing it open. That drives me insane. And we all know I’m already insane enough.

A few weeks ago, I returned some books to a used bookstore, yet she wouldn’t take them because the binding looked like I’d creased it. Because I had. Because I’d read the book. And yet, at our old used bookstore, almost all the books on the shelves looked like mine when I’m done reading them.

So I have no clue if it’s a 50/50 split thing, but apparently its considered “trashing” a book to some people.

Do you do this? Do you think its trashing the book?

See? Accordions.

See? Accordions.


The all-popular book smell.

Apparently this is a thing. I had no idea. I don’t go around sniffing books or really thinking about it at all. But I do love the new book smell. Kind of like cut grass or new paint or McDonalds.

Wait…off subject.

I can just imagine myself walking through Barnes and Noble, picking books off the shelves, opening them and sniffing them for fun. Like tasting wine or something. Moving on.

The used books? I don’t sniff those. It gives me bad mental images.

Do you sniff books?

Wow, it felt weird typing that.


Do you dog ear pages?

I don’t dog ear pages to mark where I’m at in a book. I use a bookmarker. Always.

I never bend the corner of the pages unless I want to mark some specific philosophical or disgusting things that I want to remember. NOT to mark my page. Ever. Its like a sin to me. Painful.

Poor little page, all stiff and neat and doing its job and WHAM!

I use a bookmarker.

Do you dog ear pages? Why?


Marking of the pages.

I have specific bookmarkers that I like. I think there are five that I use at once. In the novel I’m reading, books for research, books for studying the craft. A few of them are really old but I don’t abuse them, so they’ve survived. A few are new. I think I only chose one of them myself, but yeah. Love ‘em.

I would not use a random scrap of paper. I didn’t even think this was possible. Or conceivable. But what did my eyes pick up on when I looked at, um, other people – even the ones in my house? Receipts, sticky notes, scraps of paper.

The horror!

What respecting book reading individual sticks a scrap of grimy paper in there? Poor book. It’s going to need counseling.

Just kidding, it doesn’t bother me. But I do find it a little odd.

Do you use bookmarkers or paper coffee holders to mark your place while reading?

Bookmarker required.

Bookmarker required for the Daphne.


Audio, E or Touchable?

I never listen to books. I always read them. In print. On physical paper from inside the physical book which I can hold in my hands and turn actual pages.

I have nothing against e books or audio books. I just don’t prefer them. At all.

As far as audio books go – what if the reader’s voice annoyed me? And it’s easier for me to comprehend what’s going on if I can see the words as I’m reading. I’ve always been that way. So, not my cup of tea.

E books kind of annoy me. Not the fact that they exist, not the fact that they save trees (which, don’t even get me started on that because if people PLANTED a tree every time they CUT one down, we wouldn’t have this issue, now would we – oh lazy individuals who would rather complain instead of actually DOING something), and certainly not the fact that they’re cheaper.

What annoys me is that people are now threatening to get rid of physical books because THEY prefer eBooks.


Yeah. So if you like eBooks or audio books for physical books – awesome! Just keeping reading. I don’t actually mind what you do. But me? I like me my paperback books. ;)

Which do you prefer?


Book cleanliness vs. book trashiness.

I do not get them dirty. I do not rip pages, bend the cover or in any other way harm my book. Nope. Not happening.

Some people honestly don’t care. Like, it doesn’t matter to them. They don’t think of it as battering their book into oblivion. It’s just a coffee stain. The words are the same. The meaning still intact. The story didn’t go anywhere.



I’m not ridiculous about it but I’m not careless about it either.

And another thing – peoples’ opinions of what a trashed book is differ as well. One person considers ripped covers okay, the next flips like you just yanked their newborn’s hands off.

Which side are you on – clean or trashy?

(I’m talking about books here people. *glare*)


They may be accordions...

They may be accordions…

but they are otherwise unharmed.

but books I read are otherwise unharmed.


Quick, slow or in between?

It depends on the book, how much I’m liking it and my current mood/frame of mind when it comes to how fast I read it. It also depends on where I am and who is around me.

Remember when you were young and you thought reading a book in a day was the biggest achievement ever, made you like SOOO cool? Yeah, that’s so weird. Children are psychopaths. Anyway.

It also depends on what’s going on in my life. If I have a commitment, sorry but that book is not getting in the way of an appointment. Or cake. Especially if it’s chocolate.

Some people read slowly on purpose, to absorb or savor or remember the book well. Other speed through it because they must know what happens next, right now or die. I know I’ve done both.

What do you do or does it matter (do you even think about it)?


Where is Dr. Seuss?

Because he’d be able to make this rhyme.

I read in a chair, on the bed, at the table, while I’m waiting. I’ll read a book almost anywhere. The floor!

Except for the more ridiculous places and in the more outrageous situations. ;) Obviously. But then I think about some human beings and realize nothing is obvious. So yeah. I wouldn’t read a book if aliens were invading or my foot was melting or the crowned queen of England was talking to me. But really, why would she be talking to me?

Where do you normally read?

The funny thing is, I never thought about this stuff much until I couldn’t turn that book in at the used bookstore. It made me wonder about all your bookish ways, oh other people readers.


So tell me – how do you read books? Mwahahahahahahahahahaha… Anything you find funny, odd, weird or just plain unacceptable?


Filed under Personal

Would You Stay With a Cheater?

There is one opinion held by many people, widely accepted, which makes me want to blow people’s houses up. Okay, not really, but I swear I turned green a few times.

This opinion hurts people, worse than they’ve already been hurt.


What is this opinion?

When someone cheats on you, someone you love, someone you’re in a serious relationship with, the consensus is this;

“You should stay. Don’t be weak. Work it out. Leaving is the easy way out.”


*turns green* *fumes* *smashes things*


Um, no.

Leaving is not weakness.

Staying is the easy way out.





Reasons Staying is the Easy Way Out



Your relationship will never be the same again. Period. End of story. You KNOW this already, but you’re denying it to yourself and nodding along as your friends tell you things will work themselves out, or you guys can work this out.

Your gut is telling you that this is wrong. But the world is telling you not to ‘give up on him/her’, not to ‘be so weak’, ‘it happens’, etc.

Have the strength to believe in yourself, your feelings, your needs and wants.



If they cheated on you once, they will most likely do it again. I know, I know, everyone says this.

But think about it. Why did he/she cheat on you? It normally isn’t a big issue, like you ignoring them for years and years.

The reason is normally more shallow or spur of the moment. In short, dude or dudette has issues they need to work on. Issues don’t go POOF and never bother you again. They take years to get worked out. And if you stay with said person with issues for years, even if they’re getting their issues worked out? They’ll most likely cheat on you again.

Now, even if you are the couple where the cheater finds solace in another’s arms because their partner has ignored them into alienation and/or neglect? What kind of loving person could ignore you for years, putting you and your feelings and needs aside?  Do they really love you that much? Do they care? I don’t think so.



You will always wonder. If you stay with someone who has cheated on you once, there will always be that sense of foreboding or wonder. Will they do it again? There cannot be trust in a relationship if you’re wondering why your spouse is home late. And this normally leads to a negative, bitter hatred of self and your partner.



You’re afraid. Leaving is hard. You’ve spent a lot of time on this person, on this relationship. You’d have to start over. Maybe a new job, new house. With no one there to support you. It will be a lot of hard work, a lot of unknown. Where will your life go? What will you do?



If you have children, you’re teaching them that cheating is acceptable if you stay. And that opens a whole ball of wax you don’t want to touch. Like, who will your children grow up to be, believing it is all right to cheat on the person you say you love? And if you think they don’t know – you’re insulting them.



If you stay with a cheater, you will constantly wonder about your self worth and your decision making skills. Second guessing yourself because there is no harmony or trust. You have no solid ground.



You have to convince yourself you’re not a failure. And that’s hard. Failure isn’t failure in this case. You believe leaving your relationship, giving up on it, is bailing or ditching, or failing. It is not. Staying with someone who doesn’t treat your with respect is failure. Settling with what you have, is failure.




This person made the choice to cheat. It wasn’t an accident. Not oops or sorry. It wasn’t something they were forced into.

They made the decision to cheat on you.

Knowing it would hurt you.

Honestly, if you stay – it doesn’t make any sense. If this person will hurt you on purpose, you’re not in a relationship. And it certainly isn’t love, real love.

This person will not respect, honor or sacrifice for you.


Don’t settle. Consider your value, your self worth, self respect. What do you want? Do you honestly want what you have? Take a look at your life, at your relationship, a good hard look. And answer that. Truly.

You deserve better. Don’t settle for less than what you deserve.


Look at it this way. If your husband/wife/boyfriend/girlfriend/fiancé,etc truly loved you, they wouldn’t cheat on you. Love is selfless. Instant gratification isn’t on the list.

I asked my family what they would do if someone cheated on them and I had an instant uproar of painful sounding revenge, and once we got serious, they all brought up valid points. I’m going to use “he” to keep things simple. This was their serious, non cutting body parts (*cough cough* Holly) answer:

“He made a promise to me that I was the one he wanted, he was going to love me forever. So if he cheats on me, he doesn’t deserve me.”


This discussion always bodes the question:

How can you stop being someone who you have loved for so long?

Better question:

How can you stay with someone who doesn’t truly love you?


So, answer me this…

Would you stay with a cheater?

Why or why not?



*note: this post was not written to put anyone down or trash anyone who has stayed with a cheater. This is simply me telling you, that in my opinion, you deserve all the happiness possible. Please keep in mind that I do not think anyone who has stayed with a cheater is a moron. It is your choice.*


Filed under Personal

Why I Didn’t Burn ‘Dead Man Rising’ by Lilith Saintcrow

I read the first book in this series, Working for the Devil and loved it. Up until the last few pages. Then I was ready to throw it in the fireplace and watch it burn while stripping down and dancing to the sound of its death. Only, I didn’t have a fireplace, so I was probably going to settle for a bonfire in my back yard. Only I didn’t have one of those either so I said screw it and threw it in my drawer.

But then I realized I had book two in the series and for some reason unknown to me, I read the back of the book blurb.

And boy am I glad I did.

I loved Dead Man Rising. And by extension, I once again love Working for the Devil (it’s in my bookcase now).


Dead Man Rising. My favorite cover.

My favorite cover.


Dante is half demon. Last year, she was one hundred percent human. A necromancer, but human nonetheless. How is she now demon, you may ask?

Oh you know, her demon lover turned her into something altered during a steamy show of love. And then died at the end of the novel, leaving her alone, broken and clueless as to what she was.

I’m pretty sure you can guess why I loathed the ending of that book.

Japh was perfect for her and she’d only just let herself accept her feelings for him.

This book opens with Dante running herself ragged – she wishes, but she’s too strong for that now – hunting down bounties and refusing to sleep. And when she tries for it, sleep refuses her, except for the occasional nightmare.

But the devil calls, looking for her lover Japh, even though he resides as ash in the urn on her mantle. She get’s snarky with him, knowing he’s only puling on the strings of her grief. She’s a Necromancer, she knows better than anyone that once someone is dead, they’re dead. But then again, she doesn’t know much about demon souls. Not that she’s willing to accept that the devil is playing straight with her.

Dante has bigger problems soon thanks to the orphan Hall where she grew up, was owned, collared and ‘taught’ in her psionic gift by the government. The Hall was eventually shut down but not before she, and all the other children residing there, suffered much worse than beatings.

And now it’s come back to haunt her. Literally. People from the school are dying. And whatever is killing them, is not human.


This is the cover I have.

This is the cover I have. Still cool.


Dante is stubborn, brutal and refuses to give into anyone or anything. She fought tooth and nail for everything she has.

Her friend, Gabe calls her in for help on the Hall case, the first real Necromancy requiring gig since Japh died. She’s desperate and Dante knows it.

Jace, her ex lover who is still seeping in ga-ga affection for her, is hanging around. More like stalking her. He refuses to leave her alone and he’s running himself into the ground trying to keep up with Dante, as he’s only human.

Other than these two, Dante is alone in the world, but for her constant connection with Death and her psychopomp.


Something I found funny was Dante’s comments on how the media portrayed her kind, the psions. There are few of them in existence compared to humans and they never place themselves in the limelight if they can at all avoid it. Most of them are treated less than poorly. Yet, the world’s media portrays them as evil and running the world, a danger to humans. Saintcrow keeps it real, showing that even a fantasy world has heaps of superficial and species based hatred, bias and bigotry.


Saintcrow brings this world to life right away. It’s slightly futuristic but not in a science fiction way. Humans fear the psions and psions try to survive. The characters are thicker than the page and they feel so real that you wish you could hurt them when you threw the book at the wall. Just saying. Sometimes I’d love to shake Dante. But mostly, I love the hell out of her. And wish I could cut Jace’s arms off, but whatever.

Saintcrow’s writing style is a bit repetitive at times, as Dante says or thinks the same things verbatim over and over again and though it’s on purpose, sometimes its distracting. I could use a little less physical description too, as I tend to skip over large chunks of the Hall’s description as well as random places on the street.

I love how realistic Saintcrow is. She doesn’t candy coat anything and she doesn’t let anything play out easy or simple. Most of the time Dante doesn’t even think anything is going to turn out in her favor and she keeps her feet on the ground. Yet, Saintcrow manages to keep the atmosphere positive.


Another alternate cover.

Another alternate cover.


You can find Lilith Saintcrow’s books, Working for the Devil and Dead Man Rising here. And the Goodreads page for Dead Man Rising here. She also has a website.

Saintcrow lays out a dark world and gives us a darker woman, one who refuses to give into life’s cruelest killers with power or the most deadly of memories. Dante is an amazing character and I love the deeper look we get into her.


Dante’s grief for Japh’s death is eating her alive in this book and I have to admit – I’m glad about this. At the end of Working for the Devil, I figured she’d shack up with Jace and try to forget the demon, downplay his love and ignore her real feelings.

In all honestly, I was prepared to loath this book. But I had to know if there was a possibility Japh was alive.

Dead Man Rising did not disappoint. Definitely one of my favorites.


Have you read either of these books?


book 1

(book 1)


Filed under Book Reviews

Writers and Social Norms

Writers are an odd bunch, no doubt about it. We do a lot of things differently than what is socially acceptable, according to most people. Sometimes we just don’t make sense – even to ourselves.

We do weird things and we laugh at odd times and we tend to get excited when something disturbing happens – because that’s a great idea!





No Reading at the Table

Remember when you were younger and just beginning to like reading? Or you felt like doing homework while you ate dinner so you could get done quicker? And your mom looked at you over her shoulder while grabbing drinks and told you to get that book off the table.

There are some places you’re not supposed to read a book. In a grocery line, at the table, while waiting for a performance to start, blah, blah, blah.

Writers? Yeah. We don’t care. We’re whipping our book out of our bag or purse and reading. Why? Because we love it. Duh. We’re writers for heaven’s sake! And we don’t see the reason in sitting around on our butts, waiting for others when we could be reading.




Don’t Ask That

Questions. Most people don’t like them.

My sister comes home and she’ll be telling me about someone and wondering why they did this or said that or couldn’t go there. Each time, I’ll ask her, why didn’t you ask them that yourself? And each time, she’ll make this face and say she didn’t want to ask, cuz that’s just weird.

WHY?! Why not? What is so horrible about asking a question? There are most obviously some questions you don’t ask.

Like, “when’s the baby due?” because we all know how that one goes. Or, “why don‘t you and your sister just make up?” These are obvious, common sense issues.

If you’re simply curious and want to know more about a person, their culture or why they do the things they do – why not just as simply ask them? It’s up to them whether or not to answer.

I always wondered why people were like this. Then I started noticing that other writers I know feel the same.

We’re curious. We want to know. What makes you tick? Why do you think the way you think? What makes you want that?


Don't look at me, don't look at me...

Don’t look at me, don’t look at me…


Ease Dropping and People Watching are Rude

This is hilarious in our culture. If you look at someone on the streets, they’ll most likely bashfully look away. We’re of a mind to “look away, don’t notice, subtly ignore”.

That and – mind your own business. Don’t listen to me.

What do you want me to do? Close my ears?

For writers, people are our research. One of our best points of reference, one of the best places to get the spark of an ideal or the simple detail we needed to make our world come to life.

Most of us will listen in on other’s conversations if we’re in public. How better to make a character realistic if not to absorb the traits and idiosyncrasies of the people around us. If we’re waiting on someone (and don’t have a book) or simply end up sitting in a park relaxing (when does this ever happen for anyone?), we’ll watch people. How they walk, what they’re wearing, what little personality quirks show up.

Most people are surprised when you say “good morning” while walking past them in the wee hours, out walking your dog. I find that they’ll automatically look away, find themselves overtly interested in the cement or that dead tree across the way.

Me? I don’t stare, but I’ll glance. Smile and keep moving. I don’t feel ashamed when I recognize others walking on the same street. Unless of course they’re a gang banger who’ll shoot me. Then I just make sure my knife’s handy. Because knives block bullets, really. ;)

But really – people – be ware. Us writers are watching you.

*creepy voice*




Socialize or Die

Writing a novel takes a lot of time. No. See, you don’t get it. Let me make this more clear.


Research. Plotting. You need to be inspired, so find some of that. Creating characters and each one’s past and personality. Creating worlds and all the details and rules that go with it. Creating the monsters in your novel.

Then you have to write it. And rewrite it. And spend agonizing hours wondering what your beta readers and critique partners are thinking of what you wrote. And when they send their thoughts back, you’ll probably rewrite more of it. Then revise it. And revise it some more. Then write up queries. Research literary agents.

And that’s simply an idealized list of what you hope is all that happens. Because life.

And guess what?

It takes HOURS out of every day. Every single weekday at least.

People – they don’t get that. And socializing is high up on their list of important things to do. Go hang around, doing nothing together for hours to decompress.

Writers? We tend to find the specific things we want to do with others (even if that means spending some time doing nothing with them), spend that time there, and then go back to our cave, where we write. We need inspiration and time. We read. A lot. We research. A lot.

We are planted in front of a computer for hours at a time. And most people don’t get that. They also don’t understand that we enjoy that.

We do. We love it. Writing is part of who we are. When we want to socialize – we will.




Talking to Yourself means You’re Batty

I remember this movie where a writer is standing on top of a desk, looking down. Someone walks in and asks what the writer is doing.

She says she’s trying to see what it would feel like to commit suicide by jumping off the top of a building.

We’re like that. We also talk to ourselves. Only, we’re sometimes talking to other people. Who aren’t there. Or we respond to someone. Only, no one asked anything.

There are voices in our head. People walking about in our minds with their own separate lives. Writers don’t just visualize. We imagine.

Sometimes we need to stand on top of that table in order to feel the weight of gravity pulling on us. We’re writers, we need to feel it. Because if we don’t feel what we’re writing, no one reading it will either.


Do you see writers doing weird things?

Writers – do you notice people staring at you as if you have nine heads when you do something unorthodox?

Leave a comment

Filed under Creative Writing, Personal

‘Life is But a Dream’ Meaning

Most nursery rhymes and fairy tales have a disturbing background and meaning. So when my siblings and I were lying around in my room and we started singing ‘Row your Boat’, I figured it’d have some demented origin. Like rowing to your doom, being drowned or being forced down a path to your own beheading.

Surprisingly, this one has a good meaning. And when I looked it up, I was smacking my forehead. Because I already knew what it was a metaphor for. What can I say? Sometimes I forget it’s not all burning people to death and water dragons.

Duh. I love the meaning behind this nursery rhyme.

It’s a metaphor for life. We all agree on that. But there are multiple theories on how to break it down, what each object and line mean.

There are two main ideologies and a few random thoughts on specific verses.





Your boat = your life.

The stream = time. Water is always moving, so is time.

Row, row, row = you’re constantly rowing, constantly moving through life, constantly working at it. You don’t just row for a little while and then rest. Uh-uh. No breaks. No rests. Life. Keep moving.

Gently = It’s not a race. You aren’t racing toward the end – um, your death –are you? Gently row through life, don’t hurry. It’s the trip (life) not the destination (death).

Merrily, merrily, merrily, merrily = attitude, personality, character. How you look at things, positive versus negative, optimist versus pessimist. Be happy, be passionate on the way. They say attitude is everything. Enjoy your life, enjoy the ride.

Life is but a dream = Dream or nightmare, we have the ability to choose what our life will be. We cannot decide what happens, but we can decide who we are, what we become, how we react, how we cope. It’s our life, our dream. And our choice.



Boat = body. It’s the vessel for your movement, changes, growth, learning, development, awareness.

Row, row, row = you have to work for what you want in life, have to apply effort to get where you want to go. Unless you row, your boat won’t go anywhere. Be careful of distractions that could pull you away from your goal. But don’t be so focused, have such blinders on, that you don’t remain open to change, to life, to possibilities.

Gently down the stream = let go of the past, move toward your future. Row gently because to push or force or fight the natural direction your life is leading you will only create stress and upset.

Merrily, merrily, merrily, merrily = you may already have it hard. Don’t make it worse. Water can be rough but you can get through. A negative attitude will not help, in fact, it will make things worse. Use the challenges you face to make you a better person.

Life is but a dream = touches on the dreamlike state of reality. The world is physical around us, yet thoughts and emotions change, shift, alter, transmutation making something less physical, solid. Dreamlike.





  • Row, row, row your boat:

You have to row your own boat. No one else’s. Don’t try to control other people. Control yourself.

Rowing takes skill. Practice makes perfect.

When someone is rowing on their own, it implicates free will and the choices they make that decide which paths they take.

When rowing with others, it touches on the need to work together, in unity to reach the intended goal.

  • Gently down the stream:

Force creates resistance. Don’t resist if you can flow along with the water’s natural path and make something of it. This is different than fighting the challenges, the bumpy stream’s road.

  • Merrily, merrily, merrily, merrily:

Take challenges in stride, meet them with a joyous attitude and a smile. Go with the flow.

This is not a rehearsal, not a dry run, not a trial run before the real thing. This is the real thing. You might as well enjoy it. Don’t waste time being upset longer than need be or by holding grudges when you could be happy instead.

  • Life is but a dream:

So stop making it a nightmare.

It has religious overtones of how life is simply the dream before the consequences/rewards.

Life is only a dream, not real. Everything you do is meaningless. (I don’t like this one.)

Life is a short moment. Only a dream when compared to our eternal soul’s existence.





With that in mind, remember that it’s talking about your life for a reason. Ask yourself;

Row, row, row your boat.

Where are you going? Are you headed where you want to be headed? Are you working for what you want? Are you trying to control someone else’s life (with good or bad intentions)? Are you trying to control things you know you can’t/shouldn’t? Are you trying to race through your life? Are you learning, growing, achieving what you want? Are you open to positive change? Open to new paths?

Gently down the stream.

Are you fighting things for the sake of fighting them? Are you fighting for what you believe in without being cruel or self-destructive? Do you approach your life with hope? Have you worked through and let go of your past? Are you enjoying the journey, the process, whatever it is that you’re doing right now? Are you hurrying through things you could instead be enjoying? Are you flexible when things change? Do you adapt well to change?

Merrily, merrily, merrily, merrily.

Are you happy? Why or why not? Are you holding grudges or focusing on the negative to the point that you’re creating your own heartache? Are you approaching things with a positive attitude? Do you try to find the silver lining? Are you passionate about what you’re doing? Are you aware that regardless of trials, pain, suffering and challenges, there is always hope?

Life is but a dream.

There are three definitions of a dream :

1: “a succession of images, thoughts, or emotions passing through the mind during sleep.”

2: “a vision voluntarily indulged in while awake; daydream; reverie.” “an idea or vision that is created in your imagination and that is not real”

3: “something that you have wanted very much to do, be, or have for a long time”

Are you helping your life to be a dream or a nightmare? How can your life be more dreamlike; what would you need to do/achieve/change to shape your life into a dream – your dream? Are you making the right choices for yourself? If your life is a nightmare, what can you do to work toward bettering it?




Row, row, row your boat,

Gently down the stream.

Merrily, merrily, merrily, merrily,

Life is but a dream.


Just remember: Water is rough but boats are tough.


What does this rhyme mean to you? Do you have a favorite metaphor?


Sources: http://dictionary.reference.com/ and http://www.merriam-webster.com/


Filed under Research